Who Do You Love?
by Skylark Starflower
Summary: Hee hee hee ha haBWAA HAA HAAA! Lots of cheap shots and ruthless parodies ahead. Evil laugh Anything else I could say would just spoil it.


Authors note/disclaimer: I don't own WA 3. It belongs to Media Vision/Sony. Please don't sue.  
  
Hmm, what to say? ^_^ I don't think there's anything I CAN say without giving anything away except that this is a parody of certain things and full of cheap shots. ^_^. And I mean none of this as an insult. I'll explain more afterwards, so as not to give anything away.  
  
"Who Do You Love?"  
  
Started Sept. 25th, 2003  
  
Finished Sept. 27th, 2003  
  
Written by Skylark Starflower  
  
"I'm going to go to bed now, boys."  
  
The three men nodded as their leader, Virginia, skipped off up the stairs. They all watched her flounce off, a small string of drool appearing on Gallows' mouth.  
  
"She's got a butt that just won't quit," he mumbled. The other two mearly grunted in response.  
  
Gallows and Jet snapped out of it after a couple of seconds, and Clive shook his head. He coughed in embarrassment, and the three continued to sit at the bar, looking stupid.  
  
They were in Little Twister and the saloon was rather empty for this time of night. In fact, other than the barmaid and waitress, they were the only ones there.  
  
"Remind me again why we are here?" asked Clive, still looking slightly chagrined to have been caught staring at Virginia.  
  
Gallows rolled his eyes. "Well, Virginia wanted to collect information on what to do next, but if you recall, we were waiting for her to go to bed so we could booze it up and hit on the girls!" He flung his arms open to in compass the whole room. Jet looked around.  
  
"Um, what girls, Gallows?"  
  
"I'm sure that is what you had in mind, Gallows, but you can count me out," added Clive. He and Jet started to rise, drawing a groan from Gallows.  
  
"Oh, come on guys! I know it's not busy. Just stay and have a few drinks with me until it is."  
  
"Fine." Jet sat back down, but Clive remained standing.  
  
"Live a little, Clive!" grinned Gallows. Clive sighed and sat back down.  
  
"I just know I am going to regret this later."  
  
"Nah! You'll see, this'll be fun! Claudia, another round!"  
  
* * *  
  
"It's a long, long way to Tipparary!"  
  
Several rounds later, Gallows pulled Clive's mug away from the enebriated man. "I think you've had enough."  
  
Jet snickered into his drink as Clive grinned stupidly, put his face down onto the table and proceeded to laugh drunkenly.  
  
"Clive's a cheap drunk," laughed Jet, "how many have you had?"  
  
Clive held up two fingers, still laughing into the table top.  
  
"Well, he can still count," snickered Gallows, who was moving on to his seventh drink. Clive picked his head up from the table and gave Jet a lopsided grin.  
  
"I think someone is in love!" he slurred merrily.  
  
Jet started. "What!? Not true!"  
  
Gallows chuckled as Clive continued. "I know love when I see it, and you show all the signs!"  
  
Jet blushed. "You're wrong, Clive."  
  
"Am I?" he chortled happily. "So, who is it?"  
  
Jet's blush intensified ten fold. "Not telling."  
  
"Eh, we'll work it out of you eventually," snickered Gallows.  
  
* * *  
  
Bright and early the next morning, Virginia went bouncing from room to room, waking her three traveling companions.   
  
When she knocked on Clive's door, he threw his boot at it and yelled at her to go away, agrivating his hangover.  
  
* * *  
  
"Okay, boys, let's get out there and wreak some justice!"  
  
Clive, Gallows and Jet all stood and stared at their leader, or more specifically, her ass, as she skipped off into the wasteland.  
  
Jet came out of it first and smacked the other two upside the head to snap them out of it as well. "Come on, let's go!"  
  
For a short while, there was no sound save the wind and the happy little tune Virginia was humming up ahead as the team trudged down the endless trails of dust.  
  
"So, Jet, who do you love?"  
  
Clive had asked it so casually and unexpectedly that Jet almost blurted out the truth before catching himself.  
  
"None of your damn business," he grumbled, turning red.   
  
Gallows snapped his fingers and was about to say something else when Virginia turned, placed her hands on her hips and addressed the three male members from several feet ahead of them.   
  
"Are you coming, or what?"  
  
All three nodded, distracted by something below Virginia's neck, but above her navel. They hastened to catch up.  
  
* * *  
  
They reached Jolly Roger later that day. Enroute to the saloon, they ran into Roykman. He was peddling his wares as per normal. He waved to the group, although his eyes seems suspiciously like they were focused somewhere below Virginia's neck line.  
  
"Hi! So, how's being on the run treating ya?" he asked with a smile.  
  
"Ah, you know, run from some bounty hunters, hide out for a while. Run some more. Same old," replied Gallows.  
  
Roykman tagged along as they entered the saloon and they all sat down as they continued to talk.  
  
"Roykman, see any injustices we should deal with on your journeys?" asked Virginia.  
  
The traveling merchant shook his head to the negative as Gallows ordered the table beer.  
  
* * *  
  
Several hours later, everyone was drunk out of their minds, except Clive, who was passed out on the floor.  
  
"So then...so then, Becky, she says, she tells me to take the stick and leave!"  
  
The others all laughed at Roykman's story as Gallows hauled Clive back into his seat and slapped him back into consciousness.  
  
"Wake up, you're missing all the fun!"  
  
"Uhhh..." Clive wiped a string of drool from his mouth and grinned, a large idiotic grin. "Heh, heh, heh! I dare everyone here to say who they love!"  
  
"You first!" laughed Jet.  
  
"Well, it is obvious that I love Vir- I mean Catherine! I love Catherine!"  
  
There was a chorus of drunken laughter, and all eyes turned to Gallows. He threw his arms open. "There's enough of me to go around for all women!" he proclaimed. "Roykman?"  
  
The peddler grinned goofily. "Well, there is that cute little thing at Laxisland who runs the saloon, Laura."  
  
Virginia leaned over onto Jet's shoulder and smiled in what she must have thought was an enduring fashion. "I know who I love," she grinned.  
  
Jet pushed her off. "Well, I don't love you. I love Gal...uh, no one."  
  
"Ah, ah, ah!" Clive waved his finger in Jet's face. "You have to tell!"  
  
Jet turned beet red and mumbled something indistinct.  
  
"What was that?" asked Gallows, grinning like the cat that ate the canary. Virginia sat off to the side, sulking.  
  
"Mmhnmygs."  
  
"Speak up, Jet."  
  
"I LOVE GALLOWS, OKAY!?" Jet suddenly exploded. He was greeted with stunned silence. Clive face vaulted.  
  
"J-Jet?" stuttered Gallows.  
  
Roykman was laughing so hard he could barely breathe, and Virginia was shocked. She latched onto the unfortunate man at the table next to them.  
  
"If you love Gallows, then I love...uh...this guy!"  
  
Volks sweat dropped.  
  
"Fine," replied Jet, "why should I care?'  
  
"Jet?"  
  
The silver haired young man turned his attention back to Gallows. "Yes?"  
  
"I have something I'd like to admit. You see, I am also gay. I pretended to be a womanizer in a desperate attempt to remain in the closet. Let us embrace our love!"  
  
The two hugged. There was a chorus of 'awww's from the crowd.  
  
It was unfortunate about what happened next. A blue, humanoid bird wearing bright pastles dropped a nuke on the town, eradicating all life within a twenty five mile radius.   
  
Oh, well.  
  
The end.  
  
Well, there ya go. ^_^ As I was saying earlier, I mean no insult to gays. Some of my best friends are gay, even if they do talk to me too much about it, not to mention any names. *Cough*Bill*Cough* Oh, and I stuck Roykman in there for fun. ^_^  
  
But anyway, I'd like to thank Sea Wolf for inspiring this. Thank you! ^_^  
  
Oh, and I appolgize for all the cheap shots I took at Clive. He's just so much fun to torture. ^_^ I don't bash him, he's my favorite character. Oh, and I also appoligize for letting my Id loose at the end of the fic. Skylark's a bad girl. ^_^ 


End file.
